2015 Resolutions

Resolution- a formal expression of opinion or intention made.

After much prayerful discernment, I have decided on two resolutions for the 2015 year.

1) Talking positively about others. This year I discovered that certain family/friends were talking about me in a very negative way. I'm still very hurt by this but will learn to forgive and move on. While I wallowed in self pity, I realized that I need to make sure that I am not doing the same, very hurtful, thing. 

I know that this resolution may be tricky as we all, from time to time, need to vent when others are creating undo stress and frustration in our lives. Therefore I will be doing a lot of mindful journaling, prayer, and running to help refocus when those situations occur.

If you are reading this and are one of my close friends/ family, please do not draw me into gossip. I love to catch up with how people are doing and what others are up to but it's a slippery slope into negativity. 

2) Reach my personal goal weight by March 9th and commit to maintenance. I do have specific goals & benchmarks to ensure positive results. I am no longer keeping pop nor alcohol in my house, I'm not forbidding myself to have either, as this would be a quick path to failure, but if they are not readily available, it is much easier to avoid. Also consistent and diligent tracking will be a must. Following all my own advise will also be a big part of ensuring my own success! 

*If you are creating your own resolutions today, I found this great article about resolutions:

Top 10 Signs You'll Fail to Reach Your Resolutions

Wishing you all a safe and blessed New Year!

Reflection

Decisions, decision....

I LOVE this time of year because the snow is a beautiful reminder of the hope of new beginnings and fresh starts. I get excited when I get a new planner (received a great Wizard of Oz one from my mother in law this Christmas :) ) and am able to fill in dates with birthdays, events and goals. The bitter cold is also a reminder of a sense of anxiety with limitless goals to be made and a look back at resolutions that were not fulfilled in the prior year.

Goal making, for me, gives me a feeling of excitement mixed with stress. I've discovered that one thing that helps me to create a realistic resolution is to also create a detailed plan. Example, you can decide that you want to quit smoking but you aren't going to be able to wake up one morning and say, okay, I'm done, and never smoke again. There has to be steps in place, nicotine gum, patches, activities to replace all the time that used to be spent lighting up and people to support you. The same is true for any goal. It's just like building a house, you need a plan, the proper tools and support system.

I have a few resolutions/ goals in mind that I will put in tomorrow's post, however, I'm struggling with the details. There are so many great options out there for people trying to get in shape. I've tried MOST of them with great short term results. I'm very content with sticking with Weight Watchers, using myfitnesspal.com, my fitbit, working out at the Y, and using shakeology as a healthy supplement. I ran a great Holiday Survival group that's finishing up this week and kept me in check over the holidays. My local Y is running a weight loss challenge group starting next Monday and the stakes are high, money is a great motivator. I was 100% sure I was signing up for it until I ran across another money motivator (DietBet), it's an online weight loss challenge site where you can join a challenge with the potential of earning money by losing weight. Either of these will be a great motivator for me, having someone else holding me accountable with the potential of earning money, who couldn't use extra money!?!

Today I plan on doing some self reflection to not only help me to decide between the two motivators above but also to look back at past mistakes, steps to ensure said mistakes do not occur again, and how I can move forward to create a me that I can be proud of, not just in body, but in mind and soul.

Take a moment of reflection today~ think of a person that you look to as a role model? What characteristics to they encompass? How could you make changes to be more like that person?

**If you like my blog, please feel free to share it on FB, Twitter, Pinterest or any other social media! I'd love to have more readers and possibly more people to motivate!?Also PLEASE feel free to leave comments, I love hearing from all of you! :) **

Sunday Ponderings

I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas! I had a blessed day celebrating the birth of our Savior and spending quality time with friends and family over the past few days.
I'm hoping that some of my tips helped you to get through the holidays. I wish I would have followed more of them myself but I did my best to fill up with water and binge on the veggie trays. I didn't get a workout in on Thursday, Friday, or Saturday but have decided that I'm okay with that. I am grateful for the time I spent with loved ones and now have a few days to get myself back on track. I'm looking forward to getting back into a routine and having a few days to clean house (focusing on the fridge and cupboards).

With New Year's Day coming in just a few short days, it's that time of the year to look back over the past few months, evaluate, and decide what your goals are for 2015. I spent our long car trip reflecting on this past year. I believe that I made a lot of steps in the correct path; I took charge of my health, joined WW and restarted my membership to the YMCA, I began running again and completed my first 10K, I spent more quality time with my children, and furthered my education. I am very proud and grateful for all these wonderful revisions I've made in my life, however I know that this is not a simple walk in the park, it's a journey on a windy, endless path. So here I am, looking behind at the uphill, rocky path and looking ahead at a similar path, perhaps not as steep but still with many obstacles awaiting me.

Over the next couple days I will create a plan for the upcoming year's resolutions and the best way to approach them (in my opinion). For now I'm going to assess 2014 and make a list of the positive experiences and the ones that I can learn from. Have a marvelous Monday!

Give Yourself the Gift of Health!

'Tis the season for over indulgences; meat and cheese trays, cookies, dip and chips, etcetera. This is the last two weeks of holiday parties and we need to keep at the forefront of our minds that the most important thing is the time we get to spend with the people we love and NOT the food we're piling into our mouths. I am posting a list of ideas to help you maintain over the next few days. Remember that the most important gift you can give yourself is health (mental and physical)!

1. Drink lots of water (at least 8 glasses a day)!
2. Load up on the veggies from the veggie trays and lean proteins (and lighten up on the dip).
3. Don't avoid your favorite treats, cut them in half.
4. Let everyone else go through the line first.
5. Avoid mindless munching.
    a. Keep your hands busy by playing games or holding a glass of water in your hand.
    b. Get up and walk around (or go on a short walk outside, if it's nice out).
6. Wait 20 minutes before going back for seconds.
7. Determine whether the food is "worth" the calories. Take a bite, if it's not good, don't finish it! (The kids starving in Africa won't starve any more just because you threw away a partially eaten piece of pie- unless you were planning on shipping it there).
8. Bring gum to chew on while deciding if you really need that second plateful.
9. When not at a holiday party, eat healthy food (fruits, veggies, lots of fiber).
10. Pre-plan your exercise to make sure you stay active! Not only will it help to balance your eating, it will also help to relieve holiday stress.
11. Bring healthy dishes to share. Healthy doesn't mean it has to be bland!
(31 Days of Healthy Holiday Desserts)
12. Take time for yourself; a long walk, a good book, a bubble bath, etc.
13. Be a kid!
      a. Get down on the floor and play games with the young ones.
      b. Go outside and help build a snowman or snow fort.
      c. Look at this season with all its magic and joy.
      d. Go sledding or ice skating.
14. Lighten up on the adult beverages. Too many can not only make the next day not fun, it can also cause your self control to falter and over eating to ensue.
15. Get enough sleep.
16. Don't bring up politics or religion with your family! The less stress the better!
17. Pray. Take the time to center yourself and remember the true reason for the season, Jesus was born!

Hope these help some of you, I know I'm going to try my best to follow my own advise! ;)

Refusing to feel guilty!

Today at Weight Watchers we talked about determining which foods are worth eating (especially at holiday gatherings). I listened as many ladies talked about how other people would be hurt and possibly even angry if they didn't eat the food that the others had made. We talked about things that could be said to try to counter or avoid hurt feelings.

After thinking about this for a couple hours, I still feel really bothered by this conversation. Why should others take such offense when we don't eat their food? Shouldn't they be happy for us for making healthier life decisions? Perhaps even happy that we know their dish will taste so good we have to avoid it in fear of over eating. When did not accepting a plate full of food become an insult? Take a look around, one-third of U.S. adults are obese! (http://www.cdc.gov/obesity/data/adult.html) Why are we force feeding friends and family or making them feel guilty when they only take a small portion? I think, who cares if they are offended! That's an issue that they have to deal with, is their self-esteem so low that by me not eating a piece of their pumpkin pie it diminishes their self worth? Does my coming to spend quality time with you, visiting, playing games, etc. not show how much I value our relationship?

If you are hosting a gathering this holiday season or participating in a gathering by bringing a delicacy to share, please be mindful of others. You do not know the journey they are on or the internal demons they face. Would you offer a drink to a recovering alcoholic? I'd hope not, please consider those of us trying to make healthier choices as recovering junk food addicts (depending on if sugar or salt are our choice for binge eating). Don't belittle our goals or make us into the bad guys this holiday season. If you feel bad that someone isn't pigging out as much as you are at your next holiday gathering, take a look in the mirror, re-evaluate, are you really angry at the person making healthier choices or at yourself for not following suit?

Be kind, remember the reason for the season and enjoy the time with your family and friends!

Looking for the Humor

Sometimes it can be a struggle to find a reason to laugh when you are feeling stressed.Whether it's from a busy holiday schedule, overwhelmed at work or home, or just the general everyday stress of saying no to unhealthy temptations and fitting in fitness, it can get to be too much! This is the moment when you need to take a moment and laugh.

Yesterday I found more than a couple reasons to laugh at myself. One, I received a beautiful sweater from a friend. It has a cowl collar but it didn't look/ feel right when I put it on. My wonderful husband tried to help me figure out what I was doing wrong, but to no avail. It didn't look bad but I knew something was off so I went to school and found a coworker who I knew could help me out. She attempted to fix the collar and was looking at the collar and shirt and then started to laugh and said we needed to head the bathroom. Well, I had the shirt on upside down, I didn't even know you could do that with a shirt! I now know where my boys get their genetic predisposition to wearing their shirts backwards, ha! :)  Needless to say I was a little embarrassed but, more so, thought it was hilarious!

This past weekend I also got a little overwhelmed with my kids as we toured our state capitol and the beautiful Christmas tress that are set up inside. They were running around and climbing on things and when we finally got them outside they began to chase the geese. Typically, I'd be worried about what other visitors may think of my kids running after the geese or stress about all the goose poop that will be all over their shoes, instead I laughed to myself as I watched all three of them running, giggling, and having the time of their lives.

Tying into my theme of humor today, I loved the new Weight Watcher commercial. I read a lot of negative comments about the cute ad but truly enjoyed and related to the advertisement. It's true that many people eat their emotions and I know that it is very sad but as Micky Mouse said, "To laugh at yourself is to love yourself." We need to look at ourselves with joy and love and grow from our experiences. Watch the commercial, laugh, realize that you are NOT the only one that eats your emotions, and learn new and more meaningful ways to express your emotions. For me, I love to write or talk to a friend/ family member, read books with my kids, or play games... all of which require absolutely NO calorie consumption! :)

Enjoy the upcoming Hump Day and take a moment to laugh!

Weight Watchers Funny Commercial

You Do Not EARN a Piece of Cake!

While lifting weights this afternoon I was thinking about all the workouts I've done and how I should be well within my BMI. So what gives? I have people watched many times in the gym and every body is unique. What makes some look so thin and trim and others, that do the same amount of exercise or more, not? It all comes down to the kitchen and the mind.

I have heard countless times from regular class attendees that they come because they "like food too much." There is a fine line between enjoying a treat every once in awhile and treating yourself to a big mac, fries, and a diet coke because you "earned" it from that intense cycling class. The amount of calories being burned has to balance the amount being consumed, in truth, if you're trying to lose weight, the amount going in has to be less than the amount being burned. It doesn't matter how many miles you run in a week, if you aren't tracking your calorie intake those little treats that you believe you earned negate all your hard work.

Don't get me wrong, you can still create strong muscles and increase your metabolism through your intense cardio and/or strength training, but all that hard work will be camouflaged with the fat and excess weight. I believe that many people, including myself, give up so quickly on workout routines because they don't see instant results. Some continue to stick with it (me again) because they feel the difference mentally and physically but may eventually quit because those long hard workouts continue to reap no benefits.

The only way to stop this viscous cycle is to take a hard look at your diet. What are you consuming? Are you allowing yourself to have a little taste of this or just a couple little cookies? Do you finish a run and stop to pick up a bag of chips on the way home? Are you consuming enough protein for all muscle you are building? How about those fruits and veggies? They provide the nutrients your body craves. And water? I know when I start drinking more water my body reacts positively within a couple days!

Take the time to critically look at the food you have in your home, especially now with the holidays! Don't allow yourself to obliterate all your hard work with a chocolaty treat that satisfies for a few brief moments.

Be mindful!

Do as I Say and Not as I Do

Wow, I guess I let time and life just slip right past me! I have been running a Holiday Survival group and trying to motivate others to watch what they eat and get up and be active. The goal is to NOT gain and possibly to lose over the holidays. I have to say, however, that I'm totally failing as a role model.

I went into Thanksgiving feeling pretty good, started the day with the Turkey Trot 5K and followed it with a healthy protein shake... but that's where the healthy choices stopped. I broke the one rule that seems to be my ticket to healthy eating disasters... drinking alcohol. I won't lie, I love how relaxed alcohol makes me feel but, unfortunately, that lackadaisical attitude carries over into my eating habits. I don't think and just eat what tastes good. Needless to say, I gained some weight. The next day I did a lot better and got a workout in, drank a lot of water and even planned on facing the scale at WW the next day. Unfortunately, I also decided to have a "squat & plank off" with a 17 and 13 yr old. I won but definitely strained a hamstring and thus took some pain meds/ sleep meds and slept right through my WW meeting as well as my workout and straight into the middle of Saturday morning!

I'd love to tell you that I pulled myself up by the bootstraps and kicked it into high gear but that would be untrue. I DID go to step class on Sunday, Chisel Monday, treadmill Tuesday and Cycling/ Tabata today, despite that effort I did NOT watch what I ate and continued to not only clean up the unhealthy leftovers at the house but devoured the candy that was brought to the staff room at work and overindulged in the treats provided at the inservice today.

How can I fix this and move on?
1) Re-evaluate my goals... a) I REALLY want to be a WW leader, I believe in their mission and know it works. b) I want to get into the middle of my BMI range so I feel confident even when I have my slip ups (knowing I can get back down without too much difficulty). c) I want to help others on their healthy living transformation but cannot feel competent doing so unless I am doing my best 90% of the time!  d) I want to be a role model for my kids, showing not only healthy living but that they CAN achieve their goals and MAINTAIN/ inspire others!

2) I'm not going to give up, I'm going to brush myself off and reboot.

3) Focus on the positive, I've been working out, I beat two atheletic teens in a squat and plank competition, I am getting much fitter and fit into the smallest size since pre-puberty. :)

4) I will focus on my water intake and increase the fruits and veggies, decrease the carbs and dairy.

5) Pray. Anytime I get overwhelmed or stressed I need to take the time to pray about it and seek God's guidance.

Last Thoughts:
What are your health goals? Are you taking steps to not gain the dreaded holiday weight? Remember to focus on enjoying time with family and friends, the food is secondary. If it's nice out, go on a walk after a big holiday meal or play Just Dance or another fun Wii game with family & friends! Enjoy the season.

Plank Challenge (I'm in the blue)

Squat Challenge, I did a little over 300!

Shoulda Woulda Coulda

Well folks, tomorrow may not be pretty! Last week I didn't get to weigh in as we were out of town and I was NOT comfortable driving around a town I'm unfamiliar with in a winter storm. I now regret that decision as I'm not to sure that tomorrow's weigh in will be a good one. I hate excuses so I will try not to blame being a woman, having company last weekend, changing medicine, or having an EXTREMELY stressful week... Nope, it's all my own responsibility/ fault! I shouldn't have allowed myself to not track while family was visiting. I should have found alternative ways to deal with increased stress other than finding solace in chocolate. I could have realized this week would be more challenging thanks to increased water retention and made fitness and nutritional adjustments to compensate. But, here I am, unable to change what has already happened this week and facing the music (aka scale) tomorrow.

The thought of quitting has, more than once, crossed my mind. It is a challenge to think about what I'm eating and when I'm going to workout daily. It IS a lot easier than it was at the beginning but I find myself wondering if it will ever become a habit? Will I ever be faced with my favorite unhealthy indulgences and be able to eat only a small amount or avoid it altogether? Will I EVER reach the middle of my BMI range (my true personal goal)? Will I ever be content with how far I've come and where I am? Oofda, too many questions for a Friday evening!

I think I will just stick to what I know. I know that tomorrow I will head to my WW meeting with the understanding that it won't be a pleasant experience but will be another step in my journey of betterment. I will go to the Y and workout tomorrow and Sunday. I will track my food this weekend! I will also be planning my meals for the week including the Thanksgiving feast. I will get caught up at the school and look forward to a shortened school week. I will be doing the Turkey Trot Thanksgiving morning and, instead of Black Friday shopping, I plan to attend an early morning spin class and burn off some of those extra Thanksgiving treats! Maybe a little shopping or sledding later would add in some extra steps and burn some more calories. :)

So maybe I shoulda tracked better this week, woulda loved to have lost some more weight, coulda prepared a little better but I know that the journey isn't over. I still hope that this blog encourages and supports other in their efforts. Don't give up, know that others are dealing with the same issues as you and use that information to overcome your hardships, I know I do!

Goal Achieved!

Today, November 8th will be marked on my calendar as the best day of 2014! After about 10 months of watching what I eat, running, lifting weights, becoming certified to teach aerobic classes and dedicating my self to a new life of taking care of me, I FINALLY reached my weight watcher goal and became a lifetime member!

This morning I was VERY frustrated before going to WW because my scale wasn't showing all the work I had put into this week. I even went for a short run before the meeting just to see if I could make the number move (felt a lot like a wrestler trying to make weight). When I came into the meeting and was asked by the nicest WW leader ever (Ona) how I was doing, I wasn't very positive. I didn't even want to look at the darn scale... but lo and behold, the WW scale was much more kind and supportive. I loved every part of the tiny moment, the hug from Ona, the fight to hold back tears, and the pure elation while thinking about how much time and mental strength I have put into this endeavor.

This would be the point in my past where I would stop and ever so slowly gain back every pound, but not this time! I have every intention of maintaining and possibly even losing a teensy bit more (I'd like to be solidly in my BMI range with no worry of slipping out). I have many safe guards in place:

1) I would love to be a WW leader and to help others on their journey to success, in order to qualify i need to maintain.

2) I am leading a holiday weight loss/maintenance group for the next 8 weeks and definitely want to lead by example (and not lose my money) and plan to, at the very minimum, maintain... a loss would be even better! 

3) I will be subbing more at the Y and may be added to the teaching schedule this winter.

4) My beautiful boys that I love so dearly in one sentence congratulated me for making my goal and in the next encouraged me to run more so that I can get even more "flat". (I did inform them that my goal was to be healthy so I can be around for grandchildren and great-grandchildren... Cooper informed me that he has no interest in having a wife).

5) I purchased a size 6 dress that fits that was not cheap and I plan on wearing it MANY more times to get the full value of the dress! I also intend on purchasing many more new clothes (when the money is available) and have no intention of keeping the clothes that I have grown out of.

Before I end this super exciting post, I'd like to thank my wonderful hubby that has been SUPER supportive and encouraging! I know I couldn't have done it without your help! And to all my friends, family, and coworkers that have lent a listening ear, offered advice and encouragement, thank you (especially my WW leader, Ona)!

It's not all sunshine and rainbows!

*Disclaimer: I am very blessed and very happy. I have a great life and although this post has a lot of negativity, I know things could be worse and more difficult! I hope this allows others to view weight loss realistically. :)

My beautiful daughter woke me up early after a long day with a worsening cold and a long night. After getting her breakfast I read this article and it immediately struck a cord with me, (The Other Side of Weight Loss No One Talks About).

Yes, I've lost close to 30 pounds, am close to my goal and reshaped my body, the results, however, are not all they're cracked up to be! For some sad reason I believed that once you got to that magic number/ size that things would be easier, happier and all around better. In truth, some things are easier, I can run up a flight of stairs without issue, pick my kids up and run around/ play with them and I know I'm modeling a healthy lifestyle. However there are many other things that haven't changed.

EVERYDAY IS A CHALLENGE. Is it easier to make healthy choices than it was when I first started? Definitely. Nevertheless, it continues to be a constant internal battle of will power. What will I eat for breakfast? Should I have one of the treats in the teacher's lounge? Is the creamer I'm adding to my coffee making me not make my goal? Should I be drinking more water? Is my period causing me to retain water? Is my cold causing me to retain water? How do I have fun when going out without wreaking havoc on my progress? Which workouts help me make the most progress? What makes me happy? Am I spending too much time working out and not enough time with the kids?

THE FEELING OF BEING UNDER A MICROSCOPE. I admit it, I put myself out there with this blog and with my facebook posts. I do it to keep myself accountable and, hopefully, push others to make positive changes. The other side of the coin, I feel like people are judging what I eat and don't eat. Many times giving me the look or making comments that I'm not eating enough. Sometimes creating peer pressure to eat more despite the fact that I AM doing this the healthy way and am taking care of my body. I do NOT starve myself and typically ration my calories and WW points knowing that I'll have/ need more in the evenings. I also do indulge every once in awhile and feel that others look on, feeling that they are witnessing the first stages of my inevitable failure and return to my former self.

LIFE DOES NOT GET EASIER. I really thought that if I could get my weight under control that other facets of my life would not feel so overwhelming or stressful. I thought I'd have more time and energy to devote to family and work. The truth is that this healthy lifestyle choice is a full time gig. Having made many healthy new habits, some things such as grabbing an apple instead of a candy bar when hungry has made life a little easier. Be that as it may, I still struggle to find time to create healthy meals weekday evenings instead of grabbing quick meals for the family. When it's time to go grocery shopping and your kids are screaming for something to eat and all you have is chicken nuggets or hot dogs, it's even more burdensome then it was in the past... you KNOW you shouldn't eat it but you know you won't survive a trip to the grocery store with hungry kids?! Work still hasn't become less stressful, I LOVE every second of teaching but the daily stress hasn't changed just because my body has changed. My kids haven't become less demanding nor does my husband magically travel less, I still have to deal with and solve these life challenges.

YOU DO NOT BECOME A SUPERMODEL. I have ALWAYS believed that once I hit a certain number I'd be able to wear anything, including a bikini. HA! I have come to the sad realism that I will NEVER love my hips and thighs. I can do a bazillion squats and lunges and I'm still going to be a pear shape, they may get smaller and cellulite may disappear but they're always going to be too big for skinny pants. I have also done an incredible job working on my abs, in truth, I have a six pack. The problem is that the bottom of my six pack is covered by loose skin from three pregnancies and I am trying to come to grip with the fact that this may never go away. I still look in the mirror and see an insecure woman. My goal (that I'm continually working on) is to be able to look in the mirror and to see all my hard work; muscle definition, inches of fat gone from everywhere, stretch marks as signs of partaking in the beautiful gift of creating life, the beautiful eyes God (and genetics) gave me, the strength and endurance I've acquired.... It's hard to move past the idea of having a magazine worthy after all the hard work I've put in!

DEPRESSION, ANGER, & FRUSTRATION. The article I cited (The Other Side of Weight Loss No One Talks About) talks about a woman that lost 100 pounds and her struggle with depression. How she is constantly worried about gaining back the weight and how it's a struggle for her to be motivated to work out. I also battle depression and feel that it hasn't gotten better (as I'd hoped) with weight loss. I do believe that losing weight has made many things more enjoyable and easier to do, I think that the depression associated with being overweight has been replaced with fear of maintaining and the other items stated earlier. I find myself getting frustrated and angry with myself much more often because I am trying to make my goal and know that I can do it and should have made that goal a long time ago. I feel like a failure most mornings when I step on the scale. Some days it is a motivator to do better and some days it creates an entire day of negativity.

FRIENDS OR FOES. There are going to be people that encourage you one minute and then invite you over for cake and ice cream and give you a hard time when you try to decline. You will have friends and family that question your efforts and try to slow you. I have read many articles talking about how others want you to succeed but also want to experience the same success and if they aren't yet willing to change their lifestyle they will try to hinder your efforts (consciously or subconsciously). There will be others that will praise you and tell you that you look great as well as whisper about you and wonder if you're working out too much and starving yourself. You may even have to lose friends, if they are not being supportive and keep peer pressuring you to go out every weekend and maybe say, "You deserve to indulge," or "You need to loosen up," "This lifestyle isn't sustainable." You do not need those people countering your efforts (you have enough self double and negative talk in your own head, you don't need outside interference). Friends and family may also start to think that you are judging them (WHICH I AM NOT), I have tried to not offer ANY advise that is not asked for, it is meant to help but can be taken the wrong way quite quickly. I do think it is helpful to praise any efforts friends make in working toward a healthier self, it's just a fine line, many feel that I give false compliments in order to have them reciprocate... I know people who do do that, I am not. I complement because I know how encouraging those words can be in motivating continued healthy efforts.

WHAT NOW?  I keep trucking, but realistically and honestly. I shared all this not to scare others off from making healthier choices and starting/continuing their journey to a better self. I share it so people aren't doing it with false ideals. You will not have a super model body when you make your goal. Other people may not react the way you had hoped. You will still have daily stress and challenges. I know that I need to work on my mental health (as I believe the woman in the other story does as well). I need to focus on the positives and my many blessings. I have to remind myself that my efforts are not in vain. With every challenge life presents me there is opportunity to grow, challenge myself, and become a better me. I need to seek support in overcoming my weaknesses, my negative self talk , depression and anxiety. I need to realize that, just as it took lots of time to transform my body it will also take time to readjust my way of thinking!

Is this sustainable?

While squeezing in a quick run this evening, I had the passing thought, is this lifestyle sustainable?

My husband and I are both on this journey for healthy living and I have to say without his support pushing me to do my best I am not so sure that I could say yes. We have completely transformed our lives; we don't go on gas station runs for late night snack cravings, we don't have potato chips and other junk food in the house, we have a constant supply of fruits and veggies to munch on, James gets up most mornings to run, I go most evenings to a class or on a run, we sign up and look forward to races... it's all great but I have the nagging feeling in the far reaches of my mind haunting me with habits of the past. How easy would it be to stop working out and to start watching mindless T.V. like I used to do or to sit and eat my stress away?!?

I am SO close to my goal and now I have the fear creeping in, I've been this close before and slowly gained it all back... slipped right back into old, unhealthy habits. I know that this fear will always be there but I have to decide whether I am going to cave into this feeling or to utilize this fear to push me forward to not only meet my goal but to also maintain!

How do I know I can do this? The only certainty in life (other than eventual death & taxes) is that there is no certainty. However, I can make sure the cards are stacked in my favor. I have a support system in my family, my kids and husband are supportive and participants in this healthy lifestyle. I have successfully completely my instructor certificates for yoga, step aerobics, and cycling which means that I will be teaching classes and have people that look to me for support and advise. I have this blog of my journey with numerous followers that have messaged me their support, their own personal triumphs, and seeking advise... if I start to turn back to my former unhealthy habits, I will not only be letting myself down, I will also be letting my "team" of people down.

That was just the self pep talk I needed and hopefully will encourage some of you. Know that it is possible, it is a lot of hard work but with enough self determination, faith, and support WE can do it!

Wake Up and Smell the Pumpkin Spice!

I have made an observation lately through my fitbit & nike friends and just general social media-ess, people are starting to slow down on their healthy living! I get it, it's Autumn, days are getting shorter and cooler and the holidays are just around the corner. The problem is this is the most important time to amp up your healthy living habits.I also know that Autumn means holidays and many of us are already into holiday mode, especially with all the yummy fall food. First of all, it is a holiday, not holi-week or holi-month (love that saying)! Second, if you would really like to enjoy the great tastes of the season, perhaps try some new, healthy recipes (Healthy Recipes). My other hopefully, helpful tips include;

*Get out and enjoy beautiful colors by going on a walk, run, or bike ride.
*If it's too cold, and you can't tolerate bundling up to enjoy it, maybe invest in a workout video or gym membership?
* Host Thanksgiving or Christmas. I know, you're thinking, "Katie, you're nuts, that will raise my stress level and make me eat more," but if you are able and willing to host you get to be in control of the menu. You can make healthier dishes and send all the left overs home with visitors! Plus, think of all the extra calories you'll burn cleaning your house in preparation for the big day!

The most important thing is to get a grip on your eating habits. I have to give myself a little shout out, I have been working really hard to get back on track with healthy eating and tracking my food and it's finally paying off again! I am down a total of 27.4 pounds since January! I am only one pound away from becoming a lifetime member of WW and have every intention of applying to be a leader as soon as I hit my goal! If I can find the time to focus on tracking, healthy eating and working out, you can too!! Make a goal today to help you get through this season of temptations, wake up and smell that pumpkin spice. :)

I did NOT make this picture but I love the saying and know that the word STRENGTH is spelled incorrectly!

Try too Hard

Another year has passed and I believe I am the healthiest and strongest I have ever been. I can't wait for another year of becoming stronger, healthier and a better self. Part of being a better me is realizing that I can not and will not ever be perfect. I am constantly trying to be a wonderful mom, wife, teacher, friend, motivator, sibling, daughter, etc. and it is EXHAUSTING! Tonight, at Chisel class, I felt very empowered as I watched myself in the mirror lift 20 pound dumbbells and that feeling was elevated when, while stretching, we listened to Colbie Caillat sing "Try."( Colbie Caillat - Try) My interpretation of the song was that I do not need to try to impress others, keep up with others or even to make everyone happy. I need to focus on making myself happy and to love myself.

I know that most people do resolutions at the beginning of a new year, however, this is the beginning of my thirty second year of life so I feel it's the perfect time. I am devoting this year to not only reaching the mid-range of my BMI and staying there, but also to intentionally not worry about what others are thinking about me. This is going to be a HUGE challenge but I will be searching out ways to achieve this goal. I have always wanted to be loved and accepted by everyone but realize that the only person that I truly need love and acceptance from is myself, and this is the year that I find ways to do that!

Busy Life Advise

I didn't realize how much time had past since last posting but life has gotten busy, as it is for so many of us. This notion of the busy life got me thinking while I was running tonight, how can I stay on track with my healthy living goals and manage the chaos? I decided to compile a list of ideas/ advise for myself and anyone else looking for some helpful tidbits. Enjoy!

1. Pre-plan and prepare as much of your week in advance as you can. Pre-cook meals (which I have yet to do), schedule your weekly workout times (and a back up plan), pack your workout clothes and shoes and keep them in your vehicle at all times to avoid any excuses.

2. Tag team as much as you can with your significant other or a grandparent or friend, if there isn't a significant other. An example would be that my husband runs in the morning and I get up with the kids so he can do that, whereas I workout in the evenings while he puts the kids to bed. You could always partner up with a friend and have the friend take the kids on Monday evenings so you can workout and you reciprocate on Saturday mornings.

3. TURN OFF THE DAMN T.V. & COMPUTER!! I know this may be counter productive to me having a blog but I have witnessed many loved ones use the TV and social media as an escape from reality/ coping mechanism. I have nothing against the occasional movie night or watching your favorite show but when you can't go a day without it or be interrupted during your favorite show or are posting half a dozen posts a day just because... you may have a problem! Get up, go for a walk, have lunch with a friend, play with your kids/ grand kids, write someone a letter by hand, read a good book.... Studies have proven that sitting in front of a TV leads to unconscious eating and obesity. Harvard Study

4. Watch those numbers! I know that many experts will say not to weigh yourself daily (and I agree) but I don't think it's healthy to have absolutely NO idea how much you weigh or what your waist size is (the most important measurement). When you choose to turn a blind eye because you know it's going to be bad, you are choosing to not take responsibility for your own health! Dr. Oz- 5 Numbers To Know

5. Make it a family affair. I know it's not the ideal situation, I've had many a child melt down during a family walk. The benefits would be showing your children the importance of being active as well as spending (what should be) quality time with the kids. You can go on a walk, a bike ride, run around at the park, sledding, etc.

6. Don't let injury be an excuse! Do NOT decide that you are hurt and can't workout and might as well throw in the towel and eat more to "feed your emotions". If your arm or wrist is hurt you can still run, walk, etc. If your ankle or leg is injured you can still eat healthy and do some sit ups or pull ups, or lift weights. If you're dealing with back pain or arthritis you can do water aerobics or lap swimming. There are always things that can keep your body active, find what works best for you!

7. Indulge... in water and sleep! Water is so important and it is amazing how your body responds when you start drinking the proper amount. Sleep is equally important, your body and brain need time to recover so they can efficiently do their jobs (and so we can handle our chaotic lives).

To be continued... talking about sleep has made me realize that I need to hit the hay so I'll save some more tidbits for later this week!

P.S. Here are some funny memes to end the night with a chuckle!

The Long Road to Success

Sometimes it's good to take a look at your past. I know the expression that you can't move forward if you are looking in the past, however, I feel that I need to appreciate how far I have come so to give me the little nudge I'm in desperate need of to move to the next level!

Quick Recap: I had my last baby in November 2012 and then began a couch to 5K program the spring of 2013 which was a small first step in the right direction. I decided to take the next step January 2014 and joined Weight Watchers, seeing results immediately. In March of 2014 I rejoined the Y and started going to aerobic classes. Since then I have run a few 5Ks, a 10K, and am beginning to teach some aerobic and strength classes. I have gotten rid of 20 pounds and about 16 inches around my body. 

What have I learned thus far?

1. You can NOT expect to lose weight with exercise alone, changing your diet is the key to long term success.

2. Exercise is an amazing way to release stress and although some days it is difficult to convince myself to be active, I am always glad that I did!

3. You need a great support system. I am fortunate to have a husband that has been doing it right along with me, taking his morning runs while I get up with the kids so I can go in the afternoon/ evenings while he does his part. I also have Weight Watchers meetings that hold me accountable as well as a couple online motivation groups via facebook that helped kept me going on tough days. Along with all that I have some great friends to talk me into a walk, run, workout or even just a text to motivate. (If you do not have a support system in place, find someone, a group or a friend, even a walking buddy to help get you going!)

4. I believe that if you are dealing with too many stress factors (i.e. unhappy at work, unstable marriage/ family issues, financial or other problems) that is nearly impossible to tackle a lifestyle change of diet and exercise. I am so completely fortunate to have all my ducks (for the most part) in a row and to feel extremely blessed on a daily basis. (P.S. This took many job changes, counseling sessions, moves and numerous rough patches).

5. My journey is just that, a journey, with no end. I become very frustrated with how "slow" it is taking to get to my goal weight but, after looking at how far I've come in what truly hasn't been that long of a time, I know that I am capable of so many more things than I had ever thought possible. I will reach my goal weight and other goals, I will continue to revise those dreams as I continue through and create this new self.

Happy Wednesday everyone, it only gets better from here!

My Cooper and I dancing in Jan. 2013

Me at Natalie's baptism March 2013

Fourth of July in the Bad Lands 2013

The boys and I on our summer vacation June 2014

My husband and I, June 2013 and June 2014

Quit It

Everyday you are faced with options. What should I eat for breakfast? Should I have that donut in the workroom? Should I skip lunch? Should I go to the gym, run, or ride bike? Or should I make an excuse?!?

I have seen on social media more and more negativity and so many excuses!! Tonight I watched one of my favorite shows, Extreme Weight Loss, and watched as two people completely lied to Heidi and Chris (the trainers). It made me SOOO very angry for a few reasons. One, they are being given a once in a life time opportunity that many people would love to have. Two, I know people who do this on a daily basis... lie/ make excuses to justify behaviors, whether health related or not. I try very hard to avoid it but know that I slip up once in awhile. I injured my shoulder and complained about it and allowed it to be my excuse. Are you one of those people that are out their lying and making excuses? Maybe not to other people like on the show, but to the person looking back at you in the mirror? We are told how important it is to love and respect yourself and yet many of us (me included) continually allow ourselves to talk ourselves out of a workout or into eating unhealthily. "I'll only eat this one piece of chocolate," or, "I will only have this one cheat meal," or, "I can only have fun at this party if I drink and enjoy the food." I know sometimes I hear myself saying, "I will work out tomorrow," "I'm too tired to go for a walk today," "I have too many other things to do."

NO MORE LIES!! NO MORE EXCUSES!! You are TOO important to do that to yourself! Remember that you are in control of your daily choices, choose the truth! Nobody will care about your excuses but they sure will be impressed by your progress!

Sometimes you need to be quiet and listen.

My head has been spinning for the past week trying to decide where to go next on this journey for a new me. As noted earlier, I did the Refresh through beach body and had success. I believe that success would have stuck had I not been starting back to school that week (I know, excuses, excuses) and I have greatly appreciated the support that I have been getting from various beach body coaches (thank you Chanelle and Megan)! This has put me into a sticky situation, do I continue on with my beloved Weight Watchers which helped me to shed 20 pounds from January through May (and then to maintain since I was only faithful to it about 50% of the time this summer) or do I start on a new journey with beach body?

I have a little anecdote that I believe was God answering my question (yes, I believe God talks to me but that sometimes I have a difficult time listening). Today was a jam packed day of fun and anxiety and with my husband on the road I decided to take the kids on a walk tonight to get some kind of activity into my day. Within the first block, Cooper had fallen off his scooter and skinned his knee and then again in the next two blocks. He would get upset, brush it off and keep on going. I also had Miss Natalie wanting to get out of her stroller to go and play. Needless to say, it was a true sense of patience. When we returned home I put the kids to bed and was rocking Natalie and thinking about the saying that if you pray for patience you will receive opportunities to learn patience. In that instance, it hit me, I have been thinking about what I need to do next to progress in my fitness journey when those opportunities have already been presented to me. I have support groups (Weight Watchers and the beach body support groups), I know what I need to do but haven't been fully committing and then been frustrated that nothing is happening. 

So what is my plan?!? I am going to dedicate the entire month of September to my first support group, Weight Watchers. The encouragement that I have received from Ona's meetings and other members stories are what got me to where I am. I need to recommit and follow through EVERY DAY!!! Not just in the morning or just Monday through Thursday... but I am pledging here and now that I will be sticking to my 26 points EVERY SINGLE DAY for the rest of September. I will record it all and see how my body responds. Since I do work out quite a bit I will add in more protein and, possibly, protein shakes such as the shakeology shakes BUT I will also track them on the WW website and myfitnesspal.com. I am going to give it my all and if I still do not see any progress, I will reassess my options to achieving my goals. 

I will also be obtaining my certifications this month to teach step aerobics, yoga, and cycling. This may provide opportunities to make a little extra income while working out (always a positive) and then some extra spending money for more clothes, fitness clothes, and home decorations! ;)

Vocabulary Review

1. Slip up- makes a careless error.
2. Habit- a settled or regular tendency or practice, especially one that is hard to give up.
3. Binge- a short period devoted to indulging in an activity to excess, especially drinking alcohol or eating.
4. Overeating- eating too much
5. Excuse- a reason or explanation put forward to defend or justify a fault or offence.

Well I feel like I am on a constant roller coaster of eating and (for obvious reasons) on a plateau for my weight. I was thinking about a way to have a "come to Jesus" self talk so I started listing words that I use too much and incorrectly. Slip up, I am constantly saying I am having a slip up when I come home in the evenings and over eat. The problem with my vocabulary usage is that this "slip up" is happening about 3 times a week every week and therefore is no longer a "slip up" but an actual habit. I am also not going to refer to it as overeating any more, it is a binge. I will go an entire day of eating very healthy, staying on track, lots of veggies and fruits and then I will enter my home and feel the weight of the days stress and try to bury them with snack foods and an overindulgent supper within a couple hours. I am not going to label my stress as an excuse, my stress is no greater than anyone else, in fact, it's much less than many of my friends and family. So how do I change?

I think that recognizing this pattern as a habit will help me to approach it in a new manner. I can no longer allow myself to indulge and use stress as an excuse. My life is good, I have a awesome job, love my family, friends, and everything that's happening is very positive. I love to workout, which most people wouldn't say and have a great way to burn off any built up stress. The first thing that comes to mind when I think about my days that I binge is that it usually happens on days when I haven't gotten enough sleep and when I am not working out in the evening.

My goal for the next month is to hit the hay by 10 p.m. every night and to either workout in the evening or to go on a walk to keep away from the kitchen! If I need to unwind at the end of the day and have no energy I will try calling a friend to chat, read a book to the kids, have a cup a tea and/or a glass of water, take the kids to the park or to the lake to feed the fish. I need to be more proactive about nipping this habit in the butt and getting back on track. I AM going to make my goal weight by my birthday, 5 weeks and I will be in the best shape at 32 years old!

I CAN DO THIS!

School Year + Exhaustion = No Will Power

This week has been wonderful, stressful, and all around crazy. The pros of school starting up are numerous. I love being back in the school with all of my coworkers and the wonderful kids. I enjoy sharing my passion for math and science and creating lessons that make learning exciting. I also greatly enjoy that the day zooms by and I barely have time to sit down let alone mindlessly eat... that is until about 6pm. The minute I get home I am a starvin' Marvin and ravage anything and everything. We currently have very little in our home so I have been binging on sunflower seeds, graham crackers, popcorn, and diet pop. I know, why am I drinking diet pop again?!? Arg... I have been drinking WAY more water and that has helped a great deal. 

So how did this happen? Change in routine, over exhaustion, brain/ thoughts going a hundred miles an hour, too many things to accomplish and not enough time to finish it all! I feel like I spend so much time at the school and yet there are others who are there even longer and then I feel conflicted. Is is bad that I leave once a week by 4pm so that I can go to my favorite workout class? I'm there more than 9 hours most days?!? I go in many Sunday evenings during the school year and bring things home to work on? I am also starting to worry about my graduate courses and how  I'm going to fit those in as well as take care of my family and myself. I really don't want to see all my hard work toward my health to go down the drain due to stress.

How can I manage it? My ideas for starting fresh next week are to schedule in my workouts and to always have a plan b. I also need to make sure to pre pack healthy snacks and lunches to keep at work so I don't come home famished! I need to also spend part of Sunday pre planning evening meals, maybe that will help me to avoid binging on foods that I don't need or want to eat. Or I could plan my workouts for the evenings when I have been vegging on the couch mindlessly munching away... but I'm so tired... I will have to force myself to go to bed earlier and whatever doesn't get done... doesn't get done.

Okay, now to head to bed and set my plan in motion. (YAWN).

The Sound of Hunger

Well I finished up my 3 Day Refresh through beach body. I discovered many pros and cons to the three day fast. I'll start with the cons; I was HUNGRY, VERY HUNGRY! The shakes and veggies would give me a short reprieve from my stomach pains but for the majority of the refresh, I was wanting a little more to eat. The calorie total for my three days was right around 1000 calories and 16 WW points. I drank about a gallon of water each day but still had a massive headache, most likely from the caffeine withdrawal. With that little fuel in my body it wasn't recommended to do any cardio which I understand. My issue was that I was already crabby from being SUPER hungry and my go-to for uplifting a bad mood is working out. So I did fit in a bike ride, walk, and aerobic class... very naughty, I know. I did listen to my body and took breaks when needed and filled back up with more water. I also had a horrific head fog, not good when working on getting my classroom ready in preparation for the beginning of the school year!

The pros of the Refresh; I realized how much more water I need to be drinking. I know I don't quite need a gallon of water every day but I do actually think that I need much more than 8 cups. I hadn't quite been getting 8 cups before the 3 days but now will be starting my day with a tall glass of cold water and bringing a lot of icy cold water to school with me every day. Another pro was the shakes, I had the chocolate shakeology shakes with a half a banana and the vanilla with strawberries added. I was very nervous about the shakes since others had told me they didn't like them. I really did like the flavor and the short boost of energy they provided. I don't think I'd use them as a meal replacement, maybe breakfast but not lunch or supper, but I would definitely use them for a post workout snack. I also discovered a great recipe for a cucumber salad (it was provided in the booklet for the Refresh). It was very delicious and I will be using it as a side dish in the near future! The last and most important benefit I received from doing this program was the self confidence I gained by completing the program. I resisted the ice cream that my family enjoyed (I went on a walk instead) and snack food that was left over at our house. Despite being a crabby bear, I did it without giving up!

The best part were the results, I lost 8 pounds and 4 inches in the past 3 days. I know, I know, it will most likely all come back very quickly. The good thing is that I drank A LOT of water so I didn't lose all water weight and, I'm hoping, that I can pull it together and refocus on my goals. With this mindset, understanding I may put some back on but knowing that I've cleared my body of bad things, I can move forward with a healthier mind and body. Would I recommend the Refresh? Right now I'd say it's worth a try if you're willing to give up three days of body and mind activity, knowing you will be hungry and crabby. Ask me again in about a week, once I can determine if the results "stick"!

It's the little things

I wouldn't call this week a win in the weight loss front but I wouldn't call it a loss either. I haven't really moved from that wonderful number on the scale but I have taken notice of other changes. I had to run to the grocery store a couple times this week to pick up a few impromptu items. As I was coming back from one of these excursions I got to thinking about how all I had gotten was the yogurt that I had needed, grapes and bananas. Five months ago, heck, even four months ago, if I had to run to grab a couple items from the grocery store, I would never have left without buying myself a candy bar and pop to enjoy on the trip home (before the kids would see it, of course).

I had surprised myself with my realization that I was taking better care of myself (and my family) without purposeful intention. It took absolutely no internal dialogue and/or will power to tell myself that I didn't need a chocolate treat. There IS hope! Permanent life style changes can happen, it just takes time and commitment!

Knowing that I can change helps me to move into my next phase, nutrition, specifically eliminating pop for the zillionth time as well as limiting alcohol, sugar, artificial sweeteners, and processed foods. I have also taken notice that I have developed a new, not so great habit. Most people make sure to eat less than they would in front of large groups and then binge in the privacy of their own homes. I, on the other hand, have recently developed the opposite problem. Apparently, my subconscious has justified eating double, sometimes triple what I would usually eat when I am in social situations. "Normal" people would be worried that they may appear to be glutinous but, for some reason, I've allowed social situations to be my excuse to let loose and to eat the way I used to in the privacy of my home. I have to retrain my thought process and need to do this to get over this slump and to finally reach my goal.

I look forward to the day when I am able to focus on maintenance and toning. I know that day is right around the corner as long as I don't lose focus. I must remember, slow progress is still progress!