If I Were An Inventor

Because my blog is primarily about weight loss, I'm still struggling to get stress eating under control, and I had a lot of time on my hands while subbing yesterday (the teacher had the kids busy and nothing for me to help with or correct), I have composed a list of items that someone else should create because they'd be EXTREMELY helpful to weight loss.

1) Human Shock Collar: After reaching your calorie limit (or sugar or fat, depending on personal preference) for the day, you are given a not so pleasant shock anytime you try to eat more food. It would obviously reset each day.

2) Buzzing Fillings: Similar to the idea above except special dental fillings vibrate when you try to eat over your daily calorie allotment.

3) Anti Sugar Fillings: Continuing with the filling theme, create a filling that changes the flavor of sugar as it enters into your mouth into the flavor of cow's liver (or whatever your least favorite food is).

4) The SMART Retainer: A retainer that has advanced technology that analyzes all the food and drinks that you consume. It syncs with a phone app and records your calories, sugars, fats, etc. consumed. The part that I'm most excited about, the app screams at you, in German (of course), when you try to consume more than your goal.

5) The Better Belly Belt (or ring): A smart, yet fashionable belt that tightens the more you go over your daily calorie intake and loosens when you work those calories off. Belt will not unbuckle or loosen until excess calories have been burned off, seek medical attention if breathing or going to the bathroom becomes difficult.

6) The Bottomless Bottle of Water: It looks like a regular water bottle but it doesn't get all wet on the outside with condensation and is ALWAYS full of refreshing, ice cold water no matter how much you drink out of it!

**Full Disclosure**  I have absolutely no background in science or engineering!! Shocking, I know! But if you do and you decide to go ahead and create one of these absolutely amazing gadgets, please include me in the revenue stream somehow... I'm reasonable and easy to work with. ;)

The Step by Step Guide to Changing a Bad Attitude

Everyone has had a morning or two or three in which they wake up on the wrong side of the bed. Sometimes a bad mood creeps up on you after some road rage, telemarketers, bickering children, et cetera. Not that I'm speaking from experience, which I am, but I have come up with a little guide to help me alter my bad mood!

Here is my Step by Step Guide:

1) Acknowledge and accept the mood/ feelings, even if you don't fully understand them.

2) Find a quiet place for 5 minutes (put on cartoons for the kids, lock yourself in the bathroom and play relaxing music if need be)

3) Take a few long, deep breathes

4) Analyze the situation, what's bugging you? can anything be changed to fix it? Maybe writing a list of things to organize your thoughts? Finding a quick & easy recipe for supper? Sell a child? Assume a new identity, prefably in the Bahamas? (You get the idea)

5) Choose happiness. Sounds silly, but it can actually work. If you decide that you are going to be happy and look at each situation in a place of happiness, it can work (but you have to fully committ to that thought process)

6) Physically Smile. This, again, sounds foolish, but this goes along with #5. In other words, "Fake it 'til you make it!"

7) Create a mini plan to get you through the next hour that will make you happy.
Example, if your children are going crazy (thus driving you crazy), take them to the gym to run off some energy, throw some basketballs, or make them run around the outside of the house a few times (personal experience has shown this to work on occasion)!

8) Remember that YOU control your emotions and that you cannot control any one else's emotions or behaviors.

9) Lastly, remember that you don't have to wait until tomorrow to start the day over, don't allow your current negativity dictate your entire day

The next time you find yourself cursing at the car in front of you for driving too slow or yelling at your spouse for leaving dishes in the living room, take a moment to reassess the situation and choose happiness over a bad attitude.

Finding Joy in the Ordinary

Some days it takes all your energy to get out of bed, let alone make the bed, make breakfast, clean, dishes, laundry, etc. Other days all the daily tasks seem like blessings. How's that possible? Perspective, mood, a good nights sleep?

The past couple days have been completely ordinary and perfectly wonderful. After a couple weeks with lots of travel and visiting family and friends, all of which I loved, I am very grateful to be back home and in a routine.

I never thought I'd appreciate all the steps in making meals, helping with homework, putting laundry away,cleaning, and organizing things. I'm so grateful for the opportunity that I've been given to do all these things.

I've been trying to find joy daily with some of my newly established routines. I started writing in my journal each morning and evening. I start by listing the things I'm grateful for, even the mundane like making a new recipe that the whole family enjoyed! I also list prayer intentions for myself and others as well as what goal(s) I have for the day.

As well as journaling, I have been waking up earlier to start my new morning routine. I know this doesn't sound joyful, especially since I LOVE sleeping, but I have found great happiness in waking up, journaling, and then making breakfast for my family as well as preparing their lunches. Honestly not too long ago I found this idea as completely foreign and tedious. I was approaching the idea the same way that I used to when I was working full time, as another task on my endless list of tasks for each day. Now I see it as an opportunity to help lesson the load of all three of my "boys'" daily jobs.

I have found elation in organizing the game closet, vacuuming, sweeping, playing with playdough and painting with Natalie, and enjoying the 50 degree weather by taking down Christmas lights and cleaning up the garbage around the yard. How? I see the finished product, even if it's fleeting, I see the happiness in my daughter's eyes when painting or the thank yous from the boys when I make them eggs in the morning.

I aim to add meditation and more blogging into my routine. I also hope that I don't lose my ability to see the joy in the daily things and that my new routines will contribute to my success.

Life can be difficult, tedious, and feel like a constant struggle to complete tasks. We have to make an effort to see the joy in those daily tasks so that, one day, we see the joy effortlessly in all we do. The work is hard, the reward is great.

2017 The Best Year Yet: Goal Setting

Happy New Year!

A new year is a fresh start, a clean slate. Some find it cliché or, perhaps, silly to make resolutions but I think it's the perfect time. We can look back at the past year and decide what parts of ourselves we'd like to strengthen and nourish. We can also ask ourselves, "what would make me look back at this year with pride?"

I have come up with a list of things that sprung into my mind, feel free to use any of them that fit you!

* Volunteer more                *Lose X amount of weight (or get closer to my recommended BMI)
*Give up an addiction (sugar, alcohol, tobacco, pinterest-kidding, etc.)
*Take up opportunities for professional development                *Become more organized
*Spend more time in prayer/ meditation                                     *Lesson my debt/ become debt free


I know there are many more but what you/I need to do is focus on a couple of the big ones. My main focus for 2017 is to let go of my anger and frustration and concentrate on happiness and self love. I think it's important to find a thesis statement (of sorts) or commitment statement for your aspirations for the year. Now this will sound broad, because it is, however, it needs to be something that I can look in the mirror on December 31st, 2017 and say it in confidence. "I DID let go of my anger and frustration, I DID find happiness and self love!"  I know, cheesy, right? But that's just the tip of the iceberg. Let me give another example. Say that my goal was to lose 40 pounds. I cannot have a statement that says, My main focus is to lose forty pounds... well you can but, may I suggest instead to say, I will make a commitment to a healthier lifestyle and will see it reflected in my mind and body. If you need help developing a statement, I would be MORE than happy to help!

After developing your commitment statement, that's when the real work begins. How am I going to make that statement into reality? What steps can I take to ensure its fulfillment? What mini goals can I make to move myself into the right direction?

Let go back to the example of losing weight. In order to create that healthier lifestyle, there are many things that can and need to be changed. I suggest sitting down with a planner and journal (or notebook). In the notebook write down all of the things that you need to do in order to make a healthy lifestyle and the specifics that go with it.
Examples: HEALTHIER FOOD- more fruits and veggies, lots of water, healthy recipes, track foods that are consumed
EXERCISE- decide if you can afford a local gym or if you're going to work out at home, what exercises do you like or are you open to trying, when can you fit working out into your schedule, what clothes or supplies will you need to ensure you get up and moving without excuses
SUPPORT- will my family be supportive or do I need to find a group that motivates me (i.e. Weight Watchers, TOPS group, etc.), do I have a friend that would hold me accountable to go to the gym with him/her, is there a person I can call if I need a distraction from mindless eating

Once you have exhausted your list of all the things that need to change and ways to do it, then we break it all down into mini goals. Let look at the HEALTHIER FOOD category. It can be broken down into weekly goals, I will eat 3 veggies every day this week, or monthly goals, In January I will drink 60oz of water each day and consume 3-5 servings of fruits and veggies at least 25 days this month. The most important thing to do is WRITE IT DOWN, write your mini goals in your planner as a constant reminder. You should also record daily things, such as when you ARE going to workout or on this day you ARE going to try a new fruit... whatever the case may be. I also encourage you to check it off when you complete it and to be constantly making new goals. Let's say in January you worked out 20 days and you had made a goal of 20 days in February, why not switch it to 22 days?

The main idea is that you create mini goals and write them down, all feeding into your main commitment statement for the year. Never get discouraged and keep looking for new mini goals to create.

Kitchen Confessions

I'll admit it, I hated cooking, baking, and all things related to the kitchen (other than eating). I found recipes, grocery shopping, and prepping extremely tedious and unrewarding. I must also confess that my children ate many meals of mac-n-cheese, spaghetti, chicken nuggets, or corn dogs. After teaching all day, I really had no energy to think about making a meal. Maybe if I had gotten the knack for creating meals before beginning my career or perhaps before having children, I wouldn't have found it to be such a chore. 

At any rate, over the past couple months I can proudly say that I have only made the aforementioned meals a couple times. Each month I spend in this new domestic lifestyle, the more I find enjoyment in tasks that I used to consider mundane and/or frustrating. Not every task, mind you, I still can't find joy in cleaning toilets!

So this new domestic infatuation has lead me to a new lifelong friendship... I'm in LOVE with my Kitchen Aid Mixer. I have honestly had this gorgeous contraption for nearly 14 years and only used it for large family gatherings and only a handful of times. I have neglected to utilize this fantastic device to its full potential. Well no more, I will be beating and mixing things up like Martha Stuart on one of her Christmas baking specials!

I have another confession, since I didn't do much cooking and baking, I never had much need to go to the cook and bake ware aisles at the store. The other day I meandered into the aisles in search for a bigger pan for baking cookies. I was in awe at all the contraptions, tools, pans, etc. that I found. In the past, I would have seen most of these items as useless in my efforts to make a nice spaghetti meal. Now, however, after making several homemade meals and treats, I was astonished at all these cool things that would be so much more efficient than my current, meager kitchen supplies.

There is a purpose to me writing about my kitchen antics, beyond being silly. The newly exposed fondness of cooking & baking has allowed me to discover joy in the small and ordinary. Since moving and changing my lifestyle, I have fiercely searched for joy and pride. I have always thought that they come from accomplishing big goals, being promoted, executing an amazing lesson  (in the classroom), or getting kudos from a boss/principal or parent of a student. I have now found that joy can grow from within as I push my limitations and decide that I CAN create meals/ food for my family out of a bunch of ingredients (opposed to my old method of reheating pre-made foods). I am filled with pride when my family asks for seconds, tell me how much they love what I have made, or ask me to make a certain meal again.

I need to stop waiting and searching for some magnificent opportunity to give my life meaning & purpose. Instead I will find joy in the little things and count my blessings!

A Life of Fear No More

I have sat down in this spot on this page numerous times in the past three months. Each time I'd begin writing and get frustrated, worried that what I was writing sounded like whining or didn't make any sense. I was afraid that someone would read it and think I was sad, pathetic, a bad writer or worse, a bad mom/wife/ person. Eventually, I stopped even attempting to write anything.

I began writing in my own journal and realized, why am I allowing fear dominate my life?! Who cares if I write something that sounds dumb to someone else? What will happen to me if people decide not to read this or tell others that I am sad and pathetic?!? NOTHING!! I am not doing it to impress others, I write to center myself and find purpose in my day to day existence.

I dug a little deeper. What other fears have been driving me into this dark hole?

Fear of letting others down- I can write an entire book, 200 pages, 12 Chapters, of the numerous decisions I have made and make daily in an effort to not disappoint others. I have made life choices, not little ones, major life choices, so that someone else wouldn't say, "I knew that wasn't a good idea." Now, on the flip side, I can also say I have made life choices that disappointed some but made others happy... that's my struggle, who gets priority in my life choices... but it's usually not me.

Most recently, I thought that I HAD to get a job. I assumed that my husband was fervently waiting for me to find a job. I found one and was excited because I thought he was happy and proud of me. After going through training, I realized that the pay was inferior for the amount of time needed to do an efficient job. It also occurred to me that I wasn't enjoying any of the training or practicums that I was doing for this position. I was so worried that he would be upset that I just kept trucking along until a few days ago. The pressure I had put on myself was preposterous and completely irrational. Talking this over with him, gave me great perspective and one of those special moments of immense clarity. (Thus my writing tonight).

Fear of failing- This one ties in a lot with the prior one. I don't try many things that I'm unfamiliar with because I don't want to mess up. I've always resided to jobs relating to children, education and care for, because I assumed that was where I was called to be... and I am a far better person for being blessed with all the experiences, students, parents, and coworkers that I've met along the way, but I've never put serious thought into anything else out of fear of failing (and judgement-that's another big one). I'm afraid that I won't be good at any thing else despite a love of other things including math, health & fitness, and religion.

Again, I could write a book about all my fears... boo hoo Sally Sue, right?!? Well that's the great thing! God has put me in this wonderful situation to have the time and ability to pick apart my fears, to use them to grow and move forward. I can pick apart this crazy jumbled up brain of mine and dedicate some serious thought to what's next.... not what meal I'm making next, not how I'm going to decorate & organize the basement, not what winter activities I'll sign the kids up for, but what is next in MY story?! What pages will be written next, not in my book of fears but in my life legacy?

Rediscovering Love

Love: an intense feeling of deep affection (Webster, 2016)

In the hustle and bustle of life, the past decade or so have been a LOT about survival. Not third world country survival but coping with homework (my own, my students, and my kids'), housework, bills, kids, work, travel, etc.  Most people would not consider these daily living items survival situations however, when you struggle with depression and anxiety, everything can be a little more challenging. Having had some of the daily stresses reduced and a lot of thinking time, the greatest task I need to tackle is to rediscover love of myself. 

As a mom, most other moms can relate that all love is devoted to your children and spouse. We typically don't think about how we've treated ourselves. Example, if I make a mistake I should learn from it, brush it off and move on. Instead, I get very upset at myself and tell myself things like, "You never do anything right... you're so stupid!" I would NEVER say that to someone nor let my kids say that to someone or about themselves, so why is it okay that I'm doing that to myself? Why is that voice in my head not encouraging and positive? I believe that hurtful internal voice has been a large source of my difficulties over the past few years.

So what am I going to do about it? I know it won't be an overnight change. Since it's been an ugly habit for quite awhile, I'm sure it will take some time to retrain my brain. I'm starting slow, this week I found my way back into a spin class and instantly felt a sense of excitement and comfort from being back at something I enjoy. Having that same feeling as I went to two more spin classes this week, it started my wheels turning (literally and figuratively) about what other things do I equally enjoy?

Loving myself is not just about finding the things I enjoy doing. I can't spend my days riding bike and reading books... although that does sound like fun! I'm hoping to help silence the negative Katie by discovering more about myself. I don't have many answers yet, my mind is sore from reading through different questionnaires and articles on how to know yourself better. I'll keep you updated, in case you are interested in discovering your own self. 

Here's one link to get you started!  26 Questions To Help You Know Yourself Better